Thursday, April 10, 2008

No Pain, No Gain

I have always considered myself a super goal oriented person. There are times however when you realize the sacrifices made to reach the goals and wonder if it's all worth it. Being that I am just on the brink of completing my second year of grad school, I am rreeeeaaaaallllllyyyyy feeling the squeeze of it all. I am in the process of finishing up internship #1 and starting internship #2. For the next two weeks they are overlapping a bit, which is just a bit overwhelming. This is one of those weeks where I have well over 50 hours in in 3 days and it just seems to really catch up with me. This past week, for some reason, every event of my life has not been written in my calendar (which is very unusual even for disorganized me) I typically don't make a plan or a commitment without checking the master schedule. Since my youngest is preparing to enter Junior High, her schedule is definitely picking up the pace: Auditions, sports decisions, class decisions, etc. I am grateful that she is super organized, and very seldom is a last minute kind of kid, but she also relies on me to be super organized (with the schedule at least) and this week I have let her down. On Tuesday, I had to miss her DDS appointment and mandatory Cheerleading meeting, because of overlapping schedules. Good thing she remembered the meeting an hour before it was to start and her Dad was able to take her. Wednesday, I had to miss her final Orff ensemble...since I work Wed. nights to pay for her braces. AND, next week on Wed. we were supposed to go see Wicked (her last grade school field trip) but, I can't get the day off work and I have to teach that night. So...she's been on her own this past week, which really pulls at my heart strings. Last night I was in bed and she said, "Mom, come cover me" To which her Dad replied, "Do you want me to do it?" And I said no, it's one of the few things I'm able to do, so by all means let me get my butt out of bed and go cover her. (This is the time also when I put medicine on all of her various breaking out sites and then lotion her up) -- It really helps her relax and gives us a minute to bond. least I got that done. I know I have only 13 months left of this part of the journey, but there are surely times when you wonder if it's all worth it. At this point in my life, I just can't imagine having a flexible schedule, and having choices with my time. It seems a far way off, but if that is the outcome, the pain will definitely be worth the gain. When my baby is in high school, just for the record, I do not intend to miss not even one moment!

Until next time...

1 comment:

Catherine said...

I also miss free time, even simply time. We have always to choose priorities, our children, elder or youngers will always pass first. It's a "life law", no?